Scooter say should read first two parts of Scooter story first. First part is called "Scooter Save Christmas" and other part is called "Scooter and the Damsel in Distress"
Scooter Save the World
Scooter is minding own business. Not know Scooter soon to save world!
Scooter good dog. Today Scooter is out in back yard looking for right place to go potty. This is very difficult task. Scooter can not just go any place. Place must smell right. So Scooter sniff here. Scooter sniff there. Scooter move to other place. Scooter sniff that place.
“Hurry up, Scooter!” yell Granny “Quit lollygagin’ and come on!”
Scooter get frustrated with Granny sometimes. Scooter never try to hurry Granny when Granny go potty. Scooter just lay by door and wait for Granny. Granny should just wait for Scooter.
“I’m going inside, Scooter!’ say Granny.
Scooter think that good idea. Scooter is big dog. Scooter does not need help go potty. Scooter do more sniff. Scooter do more look Then Scooter find right spot.
Scooter is just finish go potty when Scooter here Scooter least favorite person.
“Can I please talk to you, Scooter?” say Evil Cat
Please? Evil Cat say “Please”. Scooter never hear this word from Evil Cat before. Evil Cat say “Do this, dog!” “Do that, mongrel” Evil Cat does not say ‘please’. Scooter is speechless.
“Do you remember yesterday when you mon.. good dogs.. chased me up the tree on Bromley Lane? I dropped something, something really important, and I need it back. Could I please have it back?”
Scooter too stunned talk. Scooter too stunned to make clever remark to Evil Cat. Scooter just stare at Evil Cat.
“The round silver thing. It fell out of my mouth and Eve caught it. May I please have it back?” say Evil Cat
Scooter think back and Scooter remember.
“Eve eat thing you drop. Thing all gone.” Say Scooter.
Evil Cat not say anything. Evil cat just turn away quickly and run.
“Hurry up, Scooter!” yell Granny “Quit lollygagin’ and come on!”
Scooter get frustrated with Granny sometimes. Scooter never try to hurry Granny when Granny go potty. Scooter just lay by door and wait for Granny. Granny should just wait for Scooter.
“I’m going inside, Scooter!’ say Granny.
Scooter think that good idea. Scooter is big dog. Scooter does not need help go potty. Scooter do more sniff. Scooter do more look Then Scooter find right spot.
Scooter is just finish go potty when Scooter here Scooter least favorite person.
“Can I please talk to you, Scooter?” say Evil Cat
Please? Evil Cat say “Please”. Scooter never hear this word from Evil Cat before. Evil Cat say “Do this, dog!” “Do that, mongrel” Evil Cat does not say ‘please’. Scooter is speechless.
“Do you remember yesterday when you mon.. good dogs.. chased me up the tree on Bromley Lane? I dropped something, something really important, and I need it back. Could I please have it back?”
Scooter too stunned talk. Scooter too stunned to make clever remark to Evil Cat. Scooter just stare at Evil Cat.
“The round silver thing. It fell out of my mouth and Eve caught it. May I please have it back?” say Evil Cat
Scooter think back and Scooter remember.
“Eve eat thing you drop. Thing all gone.” Say Scooter.
Evil Cat not say anything. Evil cat just turn away quickly and run.
x
Scooter wonder what happen. Evil Cat talk nice to Scooter. Evil Cat want silver thing. Why Evil Cat do these things? Scooter confused. Scooter also need to go inside and get snack. A few minutes later Scooter is inside. Scooter get snack from Grandpappy and go look for Eve. Scooter look and look and look. Scooter no find Eve. Scooter find Grandpappy. Grandpappy sit on couch. Grandpappy watch TV. Scooter whine.
“What’s your problem, boy?” Grandpappy say.
Scooter whine more. Scooter want to tell Grandpappy that Eve is all gone. Scooter could bark. Grandpappy would put Sccoter outside to go potty. Scooter look to Granny. Granny sit in chair with Enzo. Enzo is big baby. Enzo sit in Granny lap like Chichacha. Enzo going to get kick out of Pit Bull Club.
Then Scooter see Eve! Eve is not there! Then Eve is there!
Scooter bark and bark and bark. Grandpappy and Granny both jump!
“Scooter!” Grandpappy and Granny yell together
“What is wrong with you?!” say Granny “It’s just Eve.”
“Grrrrrrrrrrrrr” say Scooter. Scooter think something not right. Eve not there. Eve there.
“Grrrrrrrrrrrr”
“Scooter! “You go lay down” say Grandpappy
Scooter is good dog. Scooter go to dining room. Scooter think. Eve is not here. Eve is here. Eve is not here. Eve is here. Scooter head hurt.
Madie come in dining room.
“What Scooter bark at? Scooter see mail man? Madie hate mailman. Mailman walk in front of house every day! Mailman need to stay away from Madie house!”
“Scooter bark at Eve.” say Scooter
“Why Scooter bark at Eve? Did Eve eat Scooter food?” say Madie “Madie will guard food dish for Scooter!”
Scooter shake Scooter head. Scooter do shake head for two things. First Scooter shake head because Scooter not need Madie to guard food dish. Scooter is big dog. Scooter can guard food dish all by Scooter self. Second, Scooter shake head because Madie is little foo-foo dog and not tough like Scooter. But Eve and Enzo is like little puppies and Madie grrrrr at them and they run away or tell Granny. Then Granny come over and say
“Madie! That’s not your dish! You quit that and let them eat, too”
It make Scooter head shake to see little foo-foo Madie scare big dogs from food dish.
“Why Scooter bark at Eve?”
“Eve not there. Eve is there. Is not right. Scooter wonder why.” Say Scooter.
“Eve go to Australia!” say Madie. Madie sound happy to have answer to Scooter question. Even if answer is stoopid.
“Eve not go to Australia. Australia is very far away. Australia almost far as Fort Lupton!” Say Scooter.
“Grrrrrrrrrrr” say Madie “Is not!”
“Madie is stooopid”
Then Scooter sorry. Scooter bad dog. Scooter say Madie stoopid. Madie good dog. Good Dog not stooopid.
Madie hang head. Madie would have put tail between legs. Madie not do that. Madie not have tail. Scooter not know why Madie not have tail. When Madie happy, Madie wag whole butt.
“Scooter sorry” say Scooter “Scooter head hurt try to figure out why; Eve not there. Eve is there”
Madie wag butt.
“Eve go to Austrailia!” say Madie. “Eve bring Madie present!”
“What’s your problem, boy?” Grandpappy say.
Scooter whine more. Scooter want to tell Grandpappy that Eve is all gone. Scooter could bark. Grandpappy would put Sccoter outside to go potty. Scooter look to Granny. Granny sit in chair with Enzo. Enzo is big baby. Enzo sit in Granny lap like Chichacha. Enzo going to get kick out of Pit Bull Club.
Then Scooter see Eve! Eve is not there! Then Eve is there!
Scooter bark and bark and bark. Grandpappy and Granny both jump!
“Scooter!” Grandpappy and Granny yell together
“What is wrong with you?!” say Granny “It’s just Eve.”
“Grrrrrrrrrrrrr” say Scooter. Scooter think something not right. Eve not there. Eve there.
“Grrrrrrrrrrrr”
“Scooter! “You go lay down” say Grandpappy
Scooter is good dog. Scooter go to dining room. Scooter think. Eve is not here. Eve is here. Eve is not here. Eve is here. Scooter head hurt.
Madie come in dining room.
“What Scooter bark at? Scooter see mail man? Madie hate mailman. Mailman walk in front of house every day! Mailman need to stay away from Madie house!”
“Scooter bark at Eve.” say Scooter
“Why Scooter bark at Eve? Did Eve eat Scooter food?” say Madie “Madie will guard food dish for Scooter!”
Scooter shake Scooter head. Scooter do shake head for two things. First Scooter shake head because Scooter not need Madie to guard food dish. Scooter is big dog. Scooter can guard food dish all by Scooter self. Second, Scooter shake head because Madie is little foo-foo dog and not tough like Scooter. But Eve and Enzo is like little puppies and Madie grrrrr at them and they run away or tell Granny. Then Granny come over and say
“Madie! That’s not your dish! You quit that and let them eat, too”
It make Scooter head shake to see little foo-foo Madie scare big dogs from food dish.
“Why Scooter bark at Eve?”
“Eve not there. Eve is there. Is not right. Scooter wonder why.” Say Scooter.
“Eve go to Australia!” say Madie. Madie sound happy to have answer to Scooter question. Even if answer is stoopid.
“Eve not go to Australia. Australia is very far away. Australia almost far as Fort Lupton!” Say Scooter.
“Grrrrrrrrrrr” say Madie “Is not!”
“Madie is stooopid”
Then Scooter sorry. Scooter bad dog. Scooter say Madie stoopid. Madie good dog. Good Dog not stooopid.
Madie hang head. Madie would have put tail between legs. Madie not do that. Madie not have tail. Scooter not know why Madie not have tail. When Madie happy, Madie wag whole butt.
“Scooter sorry” say Scooter “Scooter head hurt try to figure out why; Eve not there. Eve is there”
Madie wag butt.
“Eve go to Austrailia!” say Madie. “Eve bring Madie present!”
c
Then Madie run away. Scooter head hurt worse.
Scooter see Enzo come in dining room.
“Scooter play with Enzo!? Enzo have new toy! Eve bring Enzo new toy from Australia!”
“Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Eve not got Australia!!” say very upset Scooter
“Yes, Eve do!” say Enzo. Then Enzo run away.
Madie come back carry something in mouth. Madie drop thing. Madie show Scooter.
“See!” say proud Madie. “Is Australian Rabbit”
Scooter look at thing. Thing not look like rabbit. Thing have big long tail. Thing have big back legs. Thing have short front legs. Thing have little thing sticking out of front. Scooter turn head sideways. Scooter see many rabbits. This not rabbit!
Scooter bark and bark and bark at thing!
Thing not move. Thing is toy. But Granny and Grandpappy not understand.
“Scooter! Granny and Grandpappy yell.
Enzo come back carry thing in mouth. Enzo drop thing. Enzo show Scooter thing.
“See” say proud Enzo “Is Australian Fish”
Scooter think Enzo lose Enzo mind. Mommy have fish in Mommy room. Fish no have fur. Fish no have claws. Fish no have flat tail. Fish no have flat nose. Scooter turn head sideways again. Scooter head hurt. Scooter too much think!
Scooter sniff thing. Thing is toy. Scooter pick up and bite thing.
“Hooonnnnkk! Say Thing.
Scooter like that and bite again.
“Hooonnnnkk!
Enzo dance and bark and bark and dance. Scooter growl. Scooter and Enzo will play with thing!
“Hooonnnnkk!
Scooter see Enzo come in dining room.
“Scooter play with Enzo!? Enzo have new toy! Eve bring Enzo new toy from Australia!”
“Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. Eve not got Australia!!” say very upset Scooter
“Yes, Eve do!” say Enzo. Then Enzo run away.
Madie come back carry something in mouth. Madie drop thing. Madie show Scooter.
“See!” say proud Madie. “Is Australian Rabbit”
Scooter look at thing. Thing not look like rabbit. Thing have big long tail. Thing have big back legs. Thing have short front legs. Thing have little thing sticking out of front. Scooter turn head sideways. Scooter see many rabbits. This not rabbit!
Scooter bark and bark and bark at thing!
Thing not move. Thing is toy. But Granny and Grandpappy not understand.
“Scooter! Granny and Grandpappy yell.
Enzo come back carry thing in mouth. Enzo drop thing. Enzo show Scooter thing.
“See” say proud Enzo “Is Australian Fish”
Scooter think Enzo lose Enzo mind. Mommy have fish in Mommy room. Fish no have fur. Fish no have claws. Fish no have flat tail. Fish no have flat nose. Scooter turn head sideways again. Scooter head hurt. Scooter too much think!
Scooter sniff thing. Thing is toy. Scooter pick up and bite thing.
“Hooonnnnkk! Say Thing.
Scooter like that and bite again.
“Hooonnnnkk!
Enzo dance and bark and bark and dance. Scooter growl. Scooter and Enzo will play with thing!
“Hooonnnnkk!
c
Is Australian Teddy Bear
“What the hell is that!? yell Grandpappy in Grandpappy mean voice. That is voice Grandpappy use when Enzo whine because Madie guard food dish. Enzo is big puppy! Enzo whine and cry until Granny make Madie not guard food dish.
Grandpappy come in see Scooter with Thing.
“What do have, Scooter?” ask Grandpappy
Scooter wag tail and woof at Grandpappy. Scooter like to play with toys.
“Gimmee that, Scooter. Let me see it” say Grandpappy
Scooter growl and wag tail and bounce and turn Scooter head.. Scooter no give toy to Grandpappy. Scooter play!
“Dumb dog.” say Grandpappy “Gimme that!” and then Grandpappy grab Thing. Scooter not let go! Scooter pull and growl and pull and wag tail! Scooter have fun!
“Scooter! Let me see that!” say Grandpappy
“Is the dog winning?” ask Granny
“No, the dog isn’t winning. He’s just being a pain in the ass. He takes after you that way” say Grandpappy.
Grandpappy smile when Grandpappy say that. Then Scooter let go and Grandpappy get thing. Grandpappy see other toy. Grandpappy see Australian Rabbit. Grandpappy pick up other toy. Grandpappy go to living room.
“When did you get them these toys?” ask Grandpappy
“I didn’t buy it. Must have been the kids.” Say Granny
“You know they will just rip them apart to get the squeakers.” Say Grandpappy
“Yes, I know. That is why I did not buy them.” Say Granny in slow voice.
“And why a Platypus and Kangeroo? You trying to give me a hint about our vacation?” say Grandpappy
“Are you deaf or are you ignoring me? I said I didn’t buy them.” Say Granny.
“Huh, did you say something?” say Grandpappy.
Granny shake Granny head and go back to read book.
Grandpappy come in see Scooter with Thing.
“What do have, Scooter?” ask Grandpappy
Scooter wag tail and woof at Grandpappy. Scooter like to play with toys.
“Gimmee that, Scooter. Let me see it” say Grandpappy
Scooter growl and wag tail and bounce and turn Scooter head.. Scooter no give toy to Grandpappy. Scooter play!
“Dumb dog.” say Grandpappy “Gimme that!” and then Grandpappy grab Thing. Scooter not let go! Scooter pull and growl and pull and wag tail! Scooter have fun!
“Scooter! Let me see that!” say Grandpappy
“Is the dog winning?” ask Granny
“No, the dog isn’t winning. He’s just being a pain in the ass. He takes after you that way” say Grandpappy.
Grandpappy smile when Grandpappy say that. Then Scooter let go and Grandpappy get thing. Grandpappy see other toy. Grandpappy see Australian Rabbit. Grandpappy pick up other toy. Grandpappy go to living room.
“When did you get them these toys?” ask Grandpappy
“I didn’t buy it. Must have been the kids.” Say Granny
“You know they will just rip them apart to get the squeakers.” Say Grandpappy
“Yes, I know. That is why I did not buy them.” Say Granny in slow voice.
“And why a Platypus and Kangeroo? You trying to give me a hint about our vacation?” say Grandpappy
“Are you deaf or are you ignoring me? I said I didn’t buy them.” Say Granny.
“Huh, did you say something?” say Grandpappy.
Granny shake Granny head and go back to read book.
c
Granny think that Mommy and Pete bring toy for Good Dogs. But then Scooter remember that Enzo say Eve bring toy. Madie say Eve bring toy. Then Scooter wonder where Eve. Scooter see Eve before. Eve always come see when Scooter and Enzo play.
‘Eve have toy for Scooter!” say Eve
Scooter jump! Eve not here. Eve here. Scooter see Eve with stuffed toy in mouth. Eve drop it.
“Is Australian Teddy Bear!” say proud Eve “Eve get it in Australia!”
“Eve no go Australia! Australia is very far away!” say Scooter
“Eve do go Australia!” say Eve
“Why does Eve not say ‘G’day Mate? Eve always say G’day Mate.” Say Scooter
“Eve go to Australia! Eve find out nobody really say G’day Mate” say Eve
Scooter think. Scooter head hurt again.
“C’mon dogs! Let’s go potty!” say Grandpappy
Good Dogs run and run and run. All try to be first out. But Scooter does not have to go potty. Scooter go potty awhile ago. Scooter just think. Scooter walk to Eve. Eve is looking for place to go potty.
“How does Eve get out of yard and go Australia?” ask skeptical Scooter
Eve not answer Scooter. Eve is sniff here. Eve is sniff there. Eve walk other spot. Eve sniff. The Eve go potty. Scooter understand. Potty spot must be just right. Eve finish go potty and then walk to Scooter.
“How does Eve get out of yard and go Australia? ask Scooter again.
“Eve go!” say Eve. “Eve think want to go to Australia. Eve go.”
Scooter turn head at Eve. Eve is talk crazy. Scooter not understand.
“Show Scooter "Go Australia.” say skeptical Scooter.
Eve get look on face like Eve go potty. Eve push and push and push.
“Eve go Australia?” ask Scooter.
Eve grrrrr at Scooter.
Eve push and push and push.
“Eve no go Australia. Eve not know why” say very upset Eve.
‘Eve have toy for Scooter!” say Eve
Scooter jump! Eve not here. Eve here. Scooter see Eve with stuffed toy in mouth. Eve drop it.
“Is Australian Teddy Bear!” say proud Eve “Eve get it in Australia!”
“Eve no go Australia! Australia is very far away!” say Scooter
“Eve do go Australia!” say Eve
“Why does Eve not say ‘G’day Mate? Eve always say G’day Mate.” Say Scooter
“Eve go to Australia! Eve find out nobody really say G’day Mate” say Eve
Scooter think. Scooter head hurt again.
“C’mon dogs! Let’s go potty!” say Grandpappy
Good Dogs run and run and run. All try to be first out. But Scooter does not have to go potty. Scooter go potty awhile ago. Scooter just think. Scooter walk to Eve. Eve is looking for place to go potty.
“How does Eve get out of yard and go Australia?” ask skeptical Scooter
Eve not answer Scooter. Eve is sniff here. Eve is sniff there. Eve walk other spot. Eve sniff. The Eve go potty. Scooter understand. Potty spot must be just right. Eve finish go potty and then walk to Scooter.
“How does Eve get out of yard and go Australia? ask Scooter again.
“Eve go!” say Eve. “Eve think want to go to Australia. Eve go.”
Scooter turn head at Eve. Eve is talk crazy. Scooter not understand.
“Show Scooter "Go Australia.” say skeptical Scooter.
Eve get look on face like Eve go potty. Eve push and push and push.
“Eve go Australia?” ask Scooter.
Eve grrrrr at Scooter.
Eve push and push and push.
“Eve no go Australia. Eve not know why” say very upset Eve.
c
Scooter must be go crazy. Scooter wonder if Eve really “go Australia”. New toys from Australia. Eve and Madie and Enzo all say Eve “go Australia” Eve not say “G’day Mate.” Eve always say “G’Day Mate.” Scooter never remember Eve tell lie before. Only cats tell lies. Even Squirels and Rabbits tell truth. Scooter head hurt again.
Scooter think lots of strange things happen. Scooter remember Nice Lady car was broke. Then not broke. Broke. Then not broke. Scooter remember Nice Lady take Scooter and Good Dogs home. Good Dogs not home. Good Dogs home. Not home. Home.
Eve there. Eve not there. There. Not there. Car broke. Car not broke. Broke. Not broke. Good Dogs not home. Good Dogs home. Not home. Home.
Scooter think Scooter see pattern. Scooter watch detective shows with Grandpappy on TV. Grandpappy like Castle. Scooter tell secret. Grandpappy not like Castle. Grandpappy like Beckett. Scooter like Beckett, too. Beckett always figure out who is bad guy. Scooter will figure out who is Bad Guy.
Scooter know! Bad Guy is Evil Cat! Evil Cat is always Bad Guy! Case solved! Scooter will go beg for treat! Then Scooter remember Evil Cat runaway when Car Broke/Car Not Broken. And Evil Cat not in house when Eve There/Eve Not There. And Evil Cat run away when Good Dogs Not Home/ Good Dogs Home. How does Evil Cat make things happen if Evil Cat is not there. Scooter is sad. Case not solved.
“Scooter! Are you going to go potty or not?!” yell Grandpappy.
Scooter think “Not” and then start to walk to door and go inside.
“If you don’t go potty, you’re not getting a treat” say Grandpappy.
Scooter not care. Scooter not like Milk Bones so much. Scooter like cookie. Grandpappy is out of cookie. Cookie all gone. Grandpappy is big pig and eat all cookie. Besides Scooter magic power always work on Grandpappy. Scooter do “Sit up” and Scooter get snack.
Scooter is still think about mystery. Scooter watch TV with Mommy one time and see show. Show have dog who solves mysteries. Dog get snacks. Dog go for ride. Dog have good time. Scooter not think of other dog name. Is other mystery for Scooter to solve. Scooter head hurt again. Scooter think he work on one mystery at a time. Scooter do “Go Lay Down” Scooter do sleep.
Scooter do unsleep and stand up. Scooter streeeeechhhh. Scooter feel better. Scooter head no hurt. Scooter is untired. But, Scooter do have to go potty. Scooter walk to Granny. Granny is look at her Little TV. Granny Little TV is like computer, except Granny mostly just read books. Granny not read Scooter stories. Bad, Granny, Bad! Granny read Stephanie Plum books. Scooter not care about that. Scooter need go potty.
“Woof” bark Scooter.
Granny look at Scooter.
“You have to go potty?”
“Woof” say Scooter
This is game Scooter have to play. Now Granny will either get up and let Scooter out, or she will make Grandpappy do it. Grandpappy is in living room too. Scooter know how this is going to end.
“William, let the dogs out to go potty” Say Granny.
Scooter is grin on the inside.
“I specifically heard him ask you” say Grandpappy “He wants you to get up off your butt and let him outside. He thinks you need the exercise. Scooter is a very smart dog, so you better do it”
Granny look at Grandpappy, roll her eyes, and go back to her Little TV.
Scooter walk over to Grandpappy and Scooter bark louder.
“Woof!”
“Traitor” Grandpappy say as Grandpappy get up.
Scooter think lots of strange things happen. Scooter remember Nice Lady car was broke. Then not broke. Broke. Then not broke. Scooter remember Nice Lady take Scooter and Good Dogs home. Good Dogs not home. Good Dogs home. Not home. Home.
Eve there. Eve not there. There. Not there. Car broke. Car not broke. Broke. Not broke. Good Dogs not home. Good Dogs home. Not home. Home.
Scooter think Scooter see pattern. Scooter watch detective shows with Grandpappy on TV. Grandpappy like Castle. Scooter tell secret. Grandpappy not like Castle. Grandpappy like Beckett. Scooter like Beckett, too. Beckett always figure out who is bad guy. Scooter will figure out who is Bad Guy.
Scooter know! Bad Guy is Evil Cat! Evil Cat is always Bad Guy! Case solved! Scooter will go beg for treat! Then Scooter remember Evil Cat runaway when Car Broke/Car Not Broken. And Evil Cat not in house when Eve There/Eve Not There. And Evil Cat run away when Good Dogs Not Home/ Good Dogs Home. How does Evil Cat make things happen if Evil Cat is not there. Scooter is sad. Case not solved.
“Scooter! Are you going to go potty or not?!” yell Grandpappy.
Scooter think “Not” and then start to walk to door and go inside.
“If you don’t go potty, you’re not getting a treat” say Grandpappy.
Scooter not care. Scooter not like Milk Bones so much. Scooter like cookie. Grandpappy is out of cookie. Cookie all gone. Grandpappy is big pig and eat all cookie. Besides Scooter magic power always work on Grandpappy. Scooter do “Sit up” and Scooter get snack.
Scooter is still think about mystery. Scooter watch TV with Mommy one time and see show. Show have dog who solves mysteries. Dog get snacks. Dog go for ride. Dog have good time. Scooter not think of other dog name. Is other mystery for Scooter to solve. Scooter head hurt again. Scooter think he work on one mystery at a time. Scooter do “Go Lay Down” Scooter do sleep.
Scooter do unsleep and stand up. Scooter streeeeechhhh. Scooter feel better. Scooter head no hurt. Scooter is untired. But, Scooter do have to go potty. Scooter walk to Granny. Granny is look at her Little TV. Granny Little TV is like computer, except Granny mostly just read books. Granny not read Scooter stories. Bad, Granny, Bad! Granny read Stephanie Plum books. Scooter not care about that. Scooter need go potty.
“Woof” bark Scooter.
Granny look at Scooter.
“You have to go potty?”
“Woof” say Scooter
This is game Scooter have to play. Now Granny will either get up and let Scooter out, or she will make Grandpappy do it. Grandpappy is in living room too. Scooter know how this is going to end.
“William, let the dogs out to go potty” Say Granny.
Scooter is grin on the inside.
“I specifically heard him ask you” say Grandpappy “He wants you to get up off your butt and let him outside. He thinks you need the exercise. Scooter is a very smart dog, so you better do it”
Granny look at Grandpappy, roll her eyes, and go back to her Little TV.
Scooter walk over to Grandpappy and Scooter bark louder.
“Woof!”
“Traitor” Grandpappy say as Grandpappy get up.
c
Evil Cat! Scooter hate Evil Cat!
“C’mon let’s go potty!” Grandpappy yell
Good Dogs come running from all areas of the house. Good Dogs always want to go outside. Sometime Outside not want Good Dogs. Sometimes is snow. Sometimes is rain. Sometimes is cold. Enzo is big baby. Enzo hate snow and cold and rain and Granny have to make Enzo go outside to go potty. Enzo is going to get kick out of Pit Bull Club. But tonight Outside do want Good Dogs.
Scooter see Madie is already squat and go potty. Scooter watch as Madie bark out
“Last Good Dog go potty has to kiss the cat!”
Grrrrrrrrrrrrr. Think Scooter. Scooter never kiss cat. Scooter hate cat. And Madie is big fat cheater. Madie does “Go Potty” and then bark. ‘Kiss Cat’. Is not fair!
Scooter see other Good Dogs go potty fast and run to door. Scooter is not kiss cat!! Scooter will bite cat! Where is cat?!
Scooter look and look and look. Scooter run to fence and look at street. Scooter see Evil Cat! Scooter bark and bark and bark! Scooter is tough! Scooter is brave! Scooter will never kiss cat!
Then Scooter wonder what is wrong! Evil Cat did not jump when Scooter bark. Evil Cat always jump because Evil Cat is afraid of tough Scooter. Evil Cat is afraid of brave Scooter. Evil Cat just walk. Evil Cat walk funny. Scooter think about this.
Then Scooter remember. This how Evil Cat walk when Good Dogs track Evil Cat other day! Evil Cat is plan bad thing again! Scooter must stop Evil Cat! Evil Cat maybe plan to kiss Scooter! Scooter would get cat oogies! Scooter would get sick! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Scooter must follow Evil Cat!
Scooter need to get out of backyard! Scooter need to follow Evil Cat! Scooter run! Scooter bark! Then Scooter is in front yard!?
Scooter stop bark! Scooter stop run! Scooter sit. Scooter is very confused. Scooter in backyard. Scooter in front yard!
Scooter jump! How Scooter get in front yard! Scooter not walk out! Scooter sit in backyard! Scooter in front yard!
Then Scooter see Evil Cat way down street. Evil Cat is still walk funny. Scooter stand up and start to run. Scooter stop! Scooter feel something stuck to Scooter back paw. Scooter shake paw and a coin-thing fall off. Now Scooter can run like mountain lion! Scooter is fast! Scooter is brave!
Evil Cat is very far in front of Scooter. But, Scooter is very fast and soon Scooter is catch up. Scooter is close enough that Evil Cat should hear Scooter and run. But, Evil Cat no run! Scooter stop. Scooter head is hurt again. Evil Cat should run away from tough Scooter. Evil Cat should run away from brave Scooter. Evil Cat just walk funny. Scooter decide to follow Evil Cat to see what Evil Cat is going to do. But, if Evil Cat try to kiss Scooter, Scooter will bite!
Scooter follow Evil Cat down Memorial Trail. Evil Cat is very slow. Scooter have time to stop and get drink from little river. Scooter not like water, but Scooter is thirsty. So Scooter stop. When Scooter done drink, Scooter catch up to Evil Cat. Evil Cat reach Bromley Lane and Evil Cat does not stop!
Bromley Lane is dangerous! There are many cars on Bromley Lane! Bromley Lane is very wide! Cars try to hit Scooter! Cars are very bad! Bad cars, bad! Evil Cat is very stoopid to go across Bromley Lane!
Scooter does not want to cross Bromley Lane. Scooter watches Evil Cat. Scooter hope Evil Cat does not go into field. If Evil Cat go into field, Scooter will either have to cross Bromley Lane or Scooter will have to go home and not know what Evil Cat is doing. Bad, Evil Cat, bad! Make Scooter head hurt.
Evil Cat not go into field! Evil Cat walk east. Scooter walk east too. Scooter keep one eye on Evil Cat and one eye on where Scooter go. Is very hard to walk with Scooter eyes looking in two different places. Scooter walk funny. Maybe this why Evil Cat walk funny too. Evil Cat is watching two things! Yeah, for smart Scooter! Smart Scooter solve mystery! Scooter is suppose to get snack when Scooter solve mystery. Scooter see that on TV. Scooter try to remember name of show. Scooter shake head. Scooter must focus on Evil Cat.
Evil Cat walk more. Evil Cat walk even more. Evil cat is still walk funny. Scooter is tired of follow Evil Cat. Evil Cat not do anything. Evil Cat is evil and boring. Scooter think Scooter will run and catch Evil Cat! Scooter start to run. Scooter will chase Evil Cat! Scooter will bite Evil Cat. Scooter will feel much better!
Good Dogs come running from all areas of the house. Good Dogs always want to go outside. Sometime Outside not want Good Dogs. Sometimes is snow. Sometimes is rain. Sometimes is cold. Enzo is big baby. Enzo hate snow and cold and rain and Granny have to make Enzo go outside to go potty. Enzo is going to get kick out of Pit Bull Club. But tonight Outside do want Good Dogs.
Scooter see Madie is already squat and go potty. Scooter watch as Madie bark out
“Last Good Dog go potty has to kiss the cat!”
Grrrrrrrrrrrrr. Think Scooter. Scooter never kiss cat. Scooter hate cat. And Madie is big fat cheater. Madie does “Go Potty” and then bark. ‘Kiss Cat’. Is not fair!
Scooter see other Good Dogs go potty fast and run to door. Scooter is not kiss cat!! Scooter will bite cat! Where is cat?!
Scooter look and look and look. Scooter run to fence and look at street. Scooter see Evil Cat! Scooter bark and bark and bark! Scooter is tough! Scooter is brave! Scooter will never kiss cat!
Then Scooter wonder what is wrong! Evil Cat did not jump when Scooter bark. Evil Cat always jump because Evil Cat is afraid of tough Scooter. Evil Cat is afraid of brave Scooter. Evil Cat just walk. Evil Cat walk funny. Scooter think about this.
Then Scooter remember. This how Evil Cat walk when Good Dogs track Evil Cat other day! Evil Cat is plan bad thing again! Scooter must stop Evil Cat! Evil Cat maybe plan to kiss Scooter! Scooter would get cat oogies! Scooter would get sick! Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr! Scooter must follow Evil Cat!
Scooter need to get out of backyard! Scooter need to follow Evil Cat! Scooter run! Scooter bark! Then Scooter is in front yard!?
Scooter stop bark! Scooter stop run! Scooter sit. Scooter is very confused. Scooter in backyard. Scooter in front yard!
Scooter jump! How Scooter get in front yard! Scooter not walk out! Scooter sit in backyard! Scooter in front yard!
Then Scooter see Evil Cat way down street. Evil Cat is still walk funny. Scooter stand up and start to run. Scooter stop! Scooter feel something stuck to Scooter back paw. Scooter shake paw and a coin-thing fall off. Now Scooter can run like mountain lion! Scooter is fast! Scooter is brave!
Evil Cat is very far in front of Scooter. But, Scooter is very fast and soon Scooter is catch up. Scooter is close enough that Evil Cat should hear Scooter and run. But, Evil Cat no run! Scooter stop. Scooter head is hurt again. Evil Cat should run away from tough Scooter. Evil Cat should run away from brave Scooter. Evil Cat just walk funny. Scooter decide to follow Evil Cat to see what Evil Cat is going to do. But, if Evil Cat try to kiss Scooter, Scooter will bite!
Scooter follow Evil Cat down Memorial Trail. Evil Cat is very slow. Scooter have time to stop and get drink from little river. Scooter not like water, but Scooter is thirsty. So Scooter stop. When Scooter done drink, Scooter catch up to Evil Cat. Evil Cat reach Bromley Lane and Evil Cat does not stop!
Bromley Lane is dangerous! There are many cars on Bromley Lane! Bromley Lane is very wide! Cars try to hit Scooter! Cars are very bad! Bad cars, bad! Evil Cat is very stoopid to go across Bromley Lane!
Scooter does not want to cross Bromley Lane. Scooter watches Evil Cat. Scooter hope Evil Cat does not go into field. If Evil Cat go into field, Scooter will either have to cross Bromley Lane or Scooter will have to go home and not know what Evil Cat is doing. Bad, Evil Cat, bad! Make Scooter head hurt.
Evil Cat not go into field! Evil Cat walk east. Scooter walk east too. Scooter keep one eye on Evil Cat and one eye on where Scooter go. Is very hard to walk with Scooter eyes looking in two different places. Scooter walk funny. Maybe this why Evil Cat walk funny too. Evil Cat is watching two things! Yeah, for smart Scooter! Smart Scooter solve mystery! Scooter is suppose to get snack when Scooter solve mystery. Scooter see that on TV. Scooter try to remember name of show. Scooter shake head. Scooter must focus on Evil Cat.
Evil Cat walk more. Evil Cat walk even more. Evil cat is still walk funny. Scooter is tired of follow Evil Cat. Evil Cat not do anything. Evil Cat is evil and boring. Scooter think Scooter will run and catch Evil Cat! Scooter start to run. Scooter will chase Evil Cat! Scooter will bite Evil Cat. Scooter will feel much better!
c
Is Bromley Hishinuma Farm. Is place where Scooter hear The Voice
Evil Cat turn south and go onto dirt road. Scooter look out into field and see old house. Scooter see old barn. Scooter see old silo. Scooter remember Grandpappy talk about this place. Is called Bromley/Hishinuma Farm. Is something called historical. Scooter hope that mean there is food for Scooter. Scooter must catch Evil Cat before Evil Cat get Scooter’s food!
Scooter must cross Bromley Lane.
‘Grrrrrrrrr’ think Scooter ‘Scooter hate cross Bromley Lane. Scooter never do before. Is dangerous and Scooter is not stoopid.”
Scooter look one way. Then Scooter look other way. Scooter not see any cars. Scooter run! Yeah for Scooter! Scooter cross Bromley Lane! Scooter should get treat! But, first Scooter must catch up to Evil Cat.
Scooter is run fast. Scooter look for Evil Cat. Evil Cat is gone! Where is Evil Cat?! Scooter only look away for second!
Scooter think ‘Grrrrrrrrrrrr. Scooter hate Evil Cat! Scooter is going to bite Evil Cat!’
Then Scooter stop and smell. Scooter can still smell Evil Cat! Scooter is great hunter! Scooter will find Evil Cat and see what Evil Cat is up to!
Scooter sniff ground and smell. Evil Cat is evil and have stinky smell. Scooter let nose lead Scooter. Scooter sniff one side. Scooter sniff other side. Scooter sniff up. Scooter sniff down. Evil Cat is not get away from Scooter!
Scooter only go a short ways when Scooter hear a voice. Scooter stop. Scooter look and look and look. Scooter hear talking. Scooter not see talking! Always when Scooter hear talking, Scooter can find person talking. But, Scooter not see talking now!
Scooter walk very slow towards talking. Scooter get low on ground, like Scooter is stalking Flower-eating Rabbit. Scooter is very quite. Scooter is great hunter. Voices get louder. Scooter know this voice! Is Evil Cat!
“I do not know, Master. The mongrel, Eve, has swallowed it”
“You stupid Earth-creature, the daedalium is not inside anything! My sensors clearly show it directly in front of your own dwelling and has been stationary for the past half hour! It moved a short distance to the west after being in the grass part of the residence to the north of your home for several hours. Go back and get it!”
Scooter jump when Scooter hear this. Voice is in Scooter head! Scooter is suddenly afraid! Then voice come back into Scooter’s head.
“I have been on the miserable hunk of rock for six months now, you inferior dolt! My power cells are nearly drained! I must have that coin!”
“Master, I have tried..” Evil Cat say. Then Voice say back
“Tried and failed. I have promised you power over those dogs and you bring me excuses!”
“Perhaps another coin, Master?” Evil Cat say like Evil Cat expected to be yelled at for peeing on floor
“Earth-creature! You are both ignorant and insolent! “I have told you before, another nickel coin will not work! It is true that because of certain properties in the two metals, nickel and daedalium are attracted to each other. However, no other coin in this area will power my craft. Because of the antiquated practice of using nickel as form of money, nickel from all over this planet had been mixed and thus the daedalium ends up concentrated in these American nickel coins. But, the modern coins do not possess enough daedalium to be of use to me! Even in the older coins there are just three in a one thousand mile radius containing enough daedalium All of these coins, save this one, have remained stationary for my entire stay here! Damn you, beast, I must have this coin and I must have it now! Daedalium is extremely rare in the universe. Every new source of it must be reported to High Command, so a plan of extraction can be implemented!”
“Yes, Master! I understand! And when your people conquere this planet, remove all of the people, I will be left to rule over the animals!” say Evil Cat.
Evil Cat will rule over Scooter?! People like Granny and Grandpappy will be gone?! Scooter must help!
Voice interrupt Scooter thoughts. Voice sound less mad.
“Cat! You must not fail me! The humanoid Earth creatures in this area have begun to take an interest in the area of my landing. I chose this spot, as it appeared to be unused, yet close enough to attract an earth creature such as you to do work for me. Now the humanoid earth creatures are repairing these dilapidated structures and it is only a matter of time before they inadvertently pierce my invisibility zone, and discover me. I can not survive outside in this poisonous nitrogen rich atmosphere and I would perish. High Command would never know of the high concentration of daedalium on this planet. When I report my discovery I will be rich rewarded.”
“I will go, Master! I will not fail!” say Evil Cat and then Evil Cat run away.
“Scooter must stop Evil Cat! Evil Cat can not help Voice to hurt Granny and Grandpappy and Mommy and Good Dogs!”
Scooter is about to run after Evil Cat, when Voice is in Scooter head again!
Scooter must cross Bromley Lane.
‘Grrrrrrrrr’ think Scooter ‘Scooter hate cross Bromley Lane. Scooter never do before. Is dangerous and Scooter is not stoopid.”
Scooter look one way. Then Scooter look other way. Scooter not see any cars. Scooter run! Yeah for Scooter! Scooter cross Bromley Lane! Scooter should get treat! But, first Scooter must catch up to Evil Cat.
Scooter is run fast. Scooter look for Evil Cat. Evil Cat is gone! Where is Evil Cat?! Scooter only look away for second!
Scooter think ‘Grrrrrrrrrrrr. Scooter hate Evil Cat! Scooter is going to bite Evil Cat!’
Then Scooter stop and smell. Scooter can still smell Evil Cat! Scooter is great hunter! Scooter will find Evil Cat and see what Evil Cat is up to!
Scooter sniff ground and smell. Evil Cat is evil and have stinky smell. Scooter let nose lead Scooter. Scooter sniff one side. Scooter sniff other side. Scooter sniff up. Scooter sniff down. Evil Cat is not get away from Scooter!
Scooter only go a short ways when Scooter hear a voice. Scooter stop. Scooter look and look and look. Scooter hear talking. Scooter not see talking! Always when Scooter hear talking, Scooter can find person talking. But, Scooter not see talking now!
Scooter walk very slow towards talking. Scooter get low on ground, like Scooter is stalking Flower-eating Rabbit. Scooter is very quite. Scooter is great hunter. Voices get louder. Scooter know this voice! Is Evil Cat!
“I do not know, Master. The mongrel, Eve, has swallowed it”
“You stupid Earth-creature, the daedalium is not inside anything! My sensors clearly show it directly in front of your own dwelling and has been stationary for the past half hour! It moved a short distance to the west after being in the grass part of the residence to the north of your home for several hours. Go back and get it!”
Scooter jump when Scooter hear this. Voice is in Scooter head! Scooter is suddenly afraid! Then voice come back into Scooter’s head.
“I have been on the miserable hunk of rock for six months now, you inferior dolt! My power cells are nearly drained! I must have that coin!”
“Master, I have tried..” Evil Cat say. Then Voice say back
“Tried and failed. I have promised you power over those dogs and you bring me excuses!”
“Perhaps another coin, Master?” Evil Cat say like Evil Cat expected to be yelled at for peeing on floor
“Earth-creature! You are both ignorant and insolent! “I have told you before, another nickel coin will not work! It is true that because of certain properties in the two metals, nickel and daedalium are attracted to each other. However, no other coin in this area will power my craft. Because of the antiquated practice of using nickel as form of money, nickel from all over this planet had been mixed and thus the daedalium ends up concentrated in these American nickel coins. But, the modern coins do not possess enough daedalium to be of use to me! Even in the older coins there are just three in a one thousand mile radius containing enough daedalium All of these coins, save this one, have remained stationary for my entire stay here! Damn you, beast, I must have this coin and I must have it now! Daedalium is extremely rare in the universe. Every new source of it must be reported to High Command, so a plan of extraction can be implemented!”
“Yes, Master! I understand! And when your people conquere this planet, remove all of the people, I will be left to rule over the animals!” say Evil Cat.
Evil Cat will rule over Scooter?! People like Granny and Grandpappy will be gone?! Scooter must help!
Voice interrupt Scooter thoughts. Voice sound less mad.
“Cat! You must not fail me! The humanoid Earth creatures in this area have begun to take an interest in the area of my landing. I chose this spot, as it appeared to be unused, yet close enough to attract an earth creature such as you to do work for me. Now the humanoid earth creatures are repairing these dilapidated structures and it is only a matter of time before they inadvertently pierce my invisibility zone, and discover me. I can not survive outside in this poisonous nitrogen rich atmosphere and I would perish. High Command would never know of the high concentration of daedalium on this planet. When I report my discovery I will be rich rewarded.”
“I will go, Master! I will not fail!” say Evil Cat and then Evil Cat run away.
“Scooter must stop Evil Cat! Evil Cat can not help Voice to hurt Granny and Grandpappy and Mommy and Good Dogs!”
Scooter is about to run after Evil Cat, when Voice is in Scooter head again!
c
Is coin-thing that The Voice want
“That ignorant earth-beast; so easy to manipulate. When High Command hears of the daedalium on this planet, all humanoid life will be killed immediately. The rest of the life on this planet will almost certainly perish within two solar cycles, us the daedalium is mined and their environment rendered unsuitable for sustaining life. This mineral is much too valuable to concern ourselves with what will be destroyed to obtain it.
Scooter is getting funny feeling in Scooter stomach. Scooter not like what Voice is saying.
The Voice starts again in Scooter head
“I also chose this spot for two reasons. First, because it is near the location of the coin with the second highest concentration of daedalium on the entire plant. I have that feline under my control and it will eventually bring me that coin!
Second, this location is close enough to a humanoid village to attempt to intercept another source of daedalium. I have not determined how, but a single earth humanoid hads discovered the power of daedalium. This earth human, Nikolaos of Myra, a former residence of area of the planet now called Turkey, posseses the single greatest concentration of mined daedalium on the planet.”
‘Scooter does not understand! What this Voice talk about! Why this Voice is Scooter head?’ think Scooter
Then Voice talk more
That foolish humanoid! He uses the powers of this mineral in such a trival manner. The mineral has the power to manipulation the time-space continuum and to rearrange matter on the molecular level. So, what does this ignorant humanoid due with it? He creates and distributes ‘gifts’, while making it appear that they just appear on a single morning near the winter solstice!”
‘Scooter know gifts!’ Scooter wonder if Voice give Scooter gift. Scooter want a hamburger!”
“I was nearly able to steal that piece of daedalium. My feline minion had it! Curses! If it had been for that meddeling canine that calls itself WonderDog..”
Scooter ear perk up.
‘Scooter is WonderDog. Scooter write stories under that name. Is good name for Scooter!’
“….I would have it! I would be able to power my spacecraft back up and return home, report my find, and receive the riches I deserve! But, now I can not wait to try again with Nikolaos of Myra. I will soon be discovered by the humanoids. I am now reduced to relying on my feline minion to retrieve this coin. I am so close! That coin is my last chance. It contains enough daedalium to power my ship to get me to a fueling station in the next galaxy. No other coin in this area will work. When I am free of the planet’s atmosphere, it will power my subspace communication device and allow me to contact High Command.”
Scooter does not know “High Command” Scooter is very confused. Scooter needs to go find Evil Cat! Evil Cat is bad! Evil Cat is probably try to steal Scooter food!”
“Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr” Scooter growl at that thought!
“What is this!” say Voice in Scooter head. “A domestic canine! Why has it ventured so close! This bears investigation!’
‘What is investigation?” Scooter thinks. Scooter is thinking it means ‘run away’ and Scooter is about to run away when there is a flash in Scooter head and the Scooter can not move!
“Canine!” Why are you here?” say Voice
Scooter say nothing. Scooter is afraid! Scooter can not move!
“Answer me!” say Voice and then there is flash and Scooter feel pain! Is pain like when Scooter step on sticker, but is sticker everywhere. Is sticker in Scooter eye! Is many, many stickers!”
“Yelp!” say Scooter. Then is flash and pain gone.
“Answer me, Canine, or the pain returns” say Voice
“Scooter follow Evil Cat” say Scooter. Scooter is very afraid
“Ahhh.” Say Voice “This one has less intelligence than the feline”
“Grrrrrr” say Scooter “Scooter is smart! Scooter is WonderDog! Scooter always beat Evil Cat!”
Scooter say that without thinking. Scooter expects more pain. But, is no flash.
Scooter is getting funny feeling in Scooter stomach. Scooter not like what Voice is saying.
The Voice starts again in Scooter head
“I also chose this spot for two reasons. First, because it is near the location of the coin with the second highest concentration of daedalium on the entire plant. I have that feline under my control and it will eventually bring me that coin!
Second, this location is close enough to a humanoid village to attempt to intercept another source of daedalium. I have not determined how, but a single earth humanoid hads discovered the power of daedalium. This earth human, Nikolaos of Myra, a former residence of area of the planet now called Turkey, posseses the single greatest concentration of mined daedalium on the planet.”
‘Scooter does not understand! What this Voice talk about! Why this Voice is Scooter head?’ think Scooter
Then Voice talk more
That foolish humanoid! He uses the powers of this mineral in such a trival manner. The mineral has the power to manipulation the time-space continuum and to rearrange matter on the molecular level. So, what does this ignorant humanoid due with it? He creates and distributes ‘gifts’, while making it appear that they just appear on a single morning near the winter solstice!”
‘Scooter know gifts!’ Scooter wonder if Voice give Scooter gift. Scooter want a hamburger!”
“I was nearly able to steal that piece of daedalium. My feline minion had it! Curses! If it had been for that meddeling canine that calls itself WonderDog..”
Scooter ear perk up.
‘Scooter is WonderDog. Scooter write stories under that name. Is good name for Scooter!’
“….I would have it! I would be able to power my spacecraft back up and return home, report my find, and receive the riches I deserve! But, now I can not wait to try again with Nikolaos of Myra. I will soon be discovered by the humanoids. I am now reduced to relying on my feline minion to retrieve this coin. I am so close! That coin is my last chance. It contains enough daedalium to power my ship to get me to a fueling station in the next galaxy. No other coin in this area will work. When I am free of the planet’s atmosphere, it will power my subspace communication device and allow me to contact High Command.”
Scooter does not know “High Command” Scooter is very confused. Scooter needs to go find Evil Cat! Evil Cat is bad! Evil Cat is probably try to steal Scooter food!”
“Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr” Scooter growl at that thought!
“What is this!” say Voice in Scooter head. “A domestic canine! Why has it ventured so close! This bears investigation!’
‘What is investigation?” Scooter thinks. Scooter is thinking it means ‘run away’ and Scooter is about to run away when there is a flash in Scooter head and the Scooter can not move!
“Canine!” Why are you here?” say Voice
Scooter say nothing. Scooter is afraid! Scooter can not move!
“Answer me!” say Voice and then there is flash and Scooter feel pain! Is pain like when Scooter step on sticker, but is sticker everywhere. Is sticker in Scooter eye! Is many, many stickers!”
“Yelp!” say Scooter. Then is flash and pain gone.
“Answer me, Canine, or the pain returns” say Voice
“Scooter follow Evil Cat” say Scooter. Scooter is very afraid
“Ahhh.” Say Voice “This one has less intelligence than the feline”
“Grrrrrr” say Scooter “Scooter is smart! Scooter is WonderDog! Scooter always beat Evil Cat!”
Scooter say that without thinking. Scooter expects more pain. But, is no flash.
c
Is part of Memorial Trail. Scooter get drink at this place
“Is that so? You are WonderDog? say Voice “It would not hurt to have a back up plan. So, WonderDog, what do you desire? Power? Do you want the feline to grovel at your feet?”
“Scooter like hamburger!” say Scooter.
“Fine, Canine! Bring me the coin that the feline seeks and I will reward you with all of the hamburgers you can eat until the end of time! Now, Go!”
There is another flash in Scooter brain and then Scooter begins to walk. But, Sccoter does not want to walk! Scooter is not do walk! Scooter is try to do ‘Stay!’. Scooter legs are not listen! Scooter is try very hard to do ‘Stay!’. Scooter is walk funny like Evil Cat! Scooter is understand why Evil Cat walk funny!”
Scooter not like this! Scooter know how to walk! But, Scooter do like hamburger! Scooter get thing before Evil Cat and bring thing back! Scooter start to run! Scooter can run!
Then Sccoter start to remember things Voice say when not know Scooter there.
“…..ignorant earth-beast; so easy to manipulate…”
“….all humanoid life will be killed….”
“….environment rendered unsuitable for sustaining life..”
Scooter stop run! Voice is evil! Maybe more evil than Evil Cat! Scooter is not let Voice get coin thing! Scooter must stop Evil Cat!
Scooter try to run again! But, Scooter can not run! Scooter can only walk funny and slow! Voice is very bad to do this to Scooter! Bad Voice, bad!
Scooter keep walking to go home! Scooter will not give up! Scooter is try to go faster! Is hard! Scooter does go faster, but is still very slow! Scooter is move like turtle! Scooter need to run like Flower-eating Rabbit! Evil Cat will get coin thing!
Scooter make it back to Memorial Trail. Is still long way to home! Scooter try very hard to run! Scooter hurt because Scooter try so hard! Scooter look down trail and see something come! Is Evil Cat! Maybe Evil Cat have thing already! Scooter must not let Evil Cat get back to the Voice!
Evil Cat come closer! Evil Cat see Scooter and slow down. Evil Cat is afraid of Scooter. Scooter is great hunter! Scooter have sharp teeth! Evil Cat should be afraid!
Scooter try to run and chase Evil Cat. Scooter can not! Scooter can only walk funny! Bad Voice, bad!
“Scooter like hamburger!” say Scooter.
“Fine, Canine! Bring me the coin that the feline seeks and I will reward you with all of the hamburgers you can eat until the end of time! Now, Go!”
There is another flash in Scooter brain and then Scooter begins to walk. But, Sccoter does not want to walk! Scooter is not do walk! Scooter is try to do ‘Stay!’. Scooter legs are not listen! Scooter is try very hard to do ‘Stay!’. Scooter is walk funny like Evil Cat! Scooter is understand why Evil Cat walk funny!”
Scooter not like this! Scooter know how to walk! But, Scooter do like hamburger! Scooter get thing before Evil Cat and bring thing back! Scooter start to run! Scooter can run!
Then Sccoter start to remember things Voice say when not know Scooter there.
“…..ignorant earth-beast; so easy to manipulate…”
“….all humanoid life will be killed….”
“….environment rendered unsuitable for sustaining life..”
Scooter stop run! Voice is evil! Maybe more evil than Evil Cat! Scooter is not let Voice get coin thing! Scooter must stop Evil Cat!
Scooter try to run again! But, Scooter can not run! Scooter can only walk funny and slow! Voice is very bad to do this to Scooter! Bad Voice, bad!
Scooter keep walking to go home! Scooter will not give up! Scooter is try to go faster! Is hard! Scooter does go faster, but is still very slow! Scooter is move like turtle! Scooter need to run like Flower-eating Rabbit! Evil Cat will get coin thing!
Scooter make it back to Memorial Trail. Is still long way to home! Scooter try very hard to run! Scooter hurt because Scooter try so hard! Scooter look down trail and see something come! Is Evil Cat! Maybe Evil Cat have thing already! Scooter must not let Evil Cat get back to the Voice!
Evil Cat come closer! Evil Cat see Scooter and slow down. Evil Cat is afraid of Scooter. Scooter is great hunter! Scooter have sharp teeth! Evil Cat should be afraid!
Scooter try to run and chase Evil Cat. Scooter can not! Scooter can only walk funny! Bad Voice, bad!
c
Is part of Memorial Trail where Scooter and Evil Cat fight.
Evil Cat walk up to Scooter like Scooter is just a tree. Evil Cat put coin thing on trail pavement and look at Scooter.
“Ha!” say Evil Cat “My master has you under his spell. You are no threat to me!”
Then Evil Cat walk up to Scooter and swipe at Scooter face!
“Yiiiipe!”
Scooter nose is burn where Evil Cat scratch Scooter is very mad! Scooter try bark, but Scooter bark does not come out. Scooter make bad sound.
“Ummp” This sound make Scooter feel afraid. Why is Scooter not Scooter?
“You pathetic, stupid, mongrel” say Evil Cat as Evil Cat walk past Scooter
Evil Cat get behind Scooter and Scooter turn head just in time to see Evil Cat swipe at Scooter again!
“Yiiiipe”
Scooter tail is now burn, too. Scooter can feel wet where Evil Cat scratch Scooter! Scooter hate wet! Scooter hate water! Scooter fight and try very hard! Scooter turn around and face Evil Cat. Evil Cat get stupid evil grin on stupid Evil Cat face.
“Good, dog! Now bow to your new master, mongrel” say Evil Cat
Scooter feel Scooter’s body try to do “Lay Down” Scooter does not want to do “Lay Down” Evil Cat is not Scooter’s master. Scooter is own master! Scooter will not do “Lay Down!”
Scooter fight! Scooter body is still try to do “Lay Down”, but Scooter can feel Scooter body stop! Scooter is winning! Scooter fight harder! Scooter think about Granny and Mommy and Grandpappy and Eve and Madie and Enzo. Scooter must not do “Lay Down”
“Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr” say Scooter as Scooter feel weight leave Scooter body!
“Evil Cat is not Master! Evil Cat is stoopid! Scooter is Scooter Master! Scooter Master tell Scooter to bite Evil Cat!”
Evil Cat not have stoopid gbrin on Evil Cat face anymore. Evil Cat look like Evil Cat see wolf! Evil Cat is close to truth! Scooter is very mad!
“Mongrel!” say Evil Cat “I must return that coin to my master! You will let me pass!”
Scooter forget about coin thing. Evil Cat put it down. Coin thing is behind Scooter. Scooter have plan!
Scooter pretend lunge at Evil Cat! Evil Cat jump back. As Evil Cat do, Quick Scooter turn and jump at coin thing! Scooter find coin thing and Scooter lick it up and swallow!
“Yuck” say Scooter.
Coin thing taste terrible! Coin thing taste like Evil Cat and poop. Scooter is think Scooter be sick.
Scooter feels the pain of Evil Cat’s claws on Scooter backside and Scooter yelps
“Yiiipe!”
“Noooo! You stupid, mongrel!” say Evil Cat
Scooter is have enough
“That is last time you touch Scooter, Cat.” Scooter say in very calm voice
“Grrrrrrrrrr” growl Scooter
Scooter see Evil Cat swallow and Evil Cat eyes get very big with fear.
“I will tell my Master!” yell Evil Cat as Evil Cat turn and run away.
Scooter is about to chase Evil Cat, but Scooter need to say something clever first, like Scooter is on TV. Scooter think fast and Scooter get idea!
“Evil Cat look both ways before Evil Cat cross street!”
‘Hee hee.’ Scooter think to Scooter. Scooter treat Evil Cat like kitten. Tell Evil Cat to look both ways. Scooter is very funny.
Then Scooter hear car horn, screeching sound and then very sick wet and crunchy sound. Scooter walk short ways to Bromley Lane. Scooter see Evil Cat. Evil Cat is laying down. Evil Cat is not move. Scooter is sure Evil Cat is dead.
“Ha!” say Evil Cat “My master has you under his spell. You are no threat to me!”
Then Evil Cat walk up to Scooter and swipe at Scooter face!
“Yiiiipe!”
Scooter nose is burn where Evil Cat scratch Scooter is very mad! Scooter try bark, but Scooter bark does not come out. Scooter make bad sound.
“Ummp” This sound make Scooter feel afraid. Why is Scooter not Scooter?
“You pathetic, stupid, mongrel” say Evil Cat as Evil Cat walk past Scooter
Evil Cat get behind Scooter and Scooter turn head just in time to see Evil Cat swipe at Scooter again!
“Yiiiipe”
Scooter tail is now burn, too. Scooter can feel wet where Evil Cat scratch Scooter! Scooter hate wet! Scooter hate water! Scooter fight and try very hard! Scooter turn around and face Evil Cat. Evil Cat get stupid evil grin on stupid Evil Cat face.
“Good, dog! Now bow to your new master, mongrel” say Evil Cat
Scooter feel Scooter’s body try to do “Lay Down” Scooter does not want to do “Lay Down” Evil Cat is not Scooter’s master. Scooter is own master! Scooter will not do “Lay Down!”
Scooter fight! Scooter body is still try to do “Lay Down”, but Scooter can feel Scooter body stop! Scooter is winning! Scooter fight harder! Scooter think about Granny and Mommy and Grandpappy and Eve and Madie and Enzo. Scooter must not do “Lay Down”
“Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr” say Scooter as Scooter feel weight leave Scooter body!
“Evil Cat is not Master! Evil Cat is stoopid! Scooter is Scooter Master! Scooter Master tell Scooter to bite Evil Cat!”
Evil Cat not have stoopid gbrin on Evil Cat face anymore. Evil Cat look like Evil Cat see wolf! Evil Cat is close to truth! Scooter is very mad!
“Mongrel!” say Evil Cat “I must return that coin to my master! You will let me pass!”
Scooter forget about coin thing. Evil Cat put it down. Coin thing is behind Scooter. Scooter have plan!
Scooter pretend lunge at Evil Cat! Evil Cat jump back. As Evil Cat do, Quick Scooter turn and jump at coin thing! Scooter find coin thing and Scooter lick it up and swallow!
“Yuck” say Scooter.
Coin thing taste terrible! Coin thing taste like Evil Cat and poop. Scooter is think Scooter be sick.
Scooter feels the pain of Evil Cat’s claws on Scooter backside and Scooter yelps
“Yiiipe!”
“Noooo! You stupid, mongrel!” say Evil Cat
Scooter is have enough
“That is last time you touch Scooter, Cat.” Scooter say in very calm voice
“Grrrrrrrrrr” growl Scooter
Scooter see Evil Cat swallow and Evil Cat eyes get very big with fear.
“I will tell my Master!” yell Evil Cat as Evil Cat turn and run away.
Scooter is about to chase Evil Cat, but Scooter need to say something clever first, like Scooter is on TV. Scooter think fast and Scooter get idea!
“Evil Cat look both ways before Evil Cat cross street!”
‘Hee hee.’ Scooter think to Scooter. Scooter treat Evil Cat like kitten. Tell Evil Cat to look both ways. Scooter is very funny.
Then Scooter hear car horn, screeching sound and then very sick wet and crunchy sound. Scooter walk short ways to Bromley Lane. Scooter see Evil Cat. Evil Cat is laying down. Evil Cat is not move. Scooter is sure Evil Cat is dead.
c
The Voice is All Gone!
Scooter is little sad. Evil Cat not deserve to get hit by car. Is worst way for animal to die.
Then Scooter’s tail and nose start to hurt.
Then Scooter think “Scooter did tell Evil Cat to look both ways. Evil Cat not listen”
Car that hit Evil Cat was stop and man get out.
“Damn it! Friggin’ cat just darted out in front of me!”
Other cars are honk at man and drive around him. Man should get out of street before man get hit.
Man must be smarter than Evil Cat. Man take white cloth out of pocket. As man do this coin things also come out and fall on ground. Man move Evil Cat to sidewalk, get back in car and drive away. Scooter remember something else Voice say
“…….No other coin in this area will work…”
Scooter have idea!
Scooter walk over to where man was, and spot coin-thing. Scooter think it same kind coin-thing as coin-thing Scooter swallow. Scooter look both ways because Scooter is smarter than Evil Cat, and quickly lick up other coin-thing. Scooter think this coin thing just taste like dirt. Scooter does not care. Scooter play in dirt all the time!
Scooter look both ways again and quickly cross Bromley Lane and walk towards place where Voice get in Scooter head. Scooter is little afraid. If Scooter plan not work maybe Voice will hurt Scooter. But, Scooter must try. Voice is evil.
When Scooter get close to Voice place, Scooter do ‘Walk Funny’. Scooter keep do “Walk Funny” until Voice is in Scooter head!
‘You have it!” say Voice My sensors register it! Quickly, drop it and back away!”
Scooter let coin thing fall to ground and then Scooter take two steps back.
Scooter is watch coin thing. Coin-thing is there. Coin-thing is not there!
“I must go immediately! My riches await me! Begone you ignorant canine, if you are lucky the miners will kill you first when they arrive to exploit this planet!”
Then Scooter see a flash of light and for very fast second Scooter see a big building thing. Big building thing is jump off the ground. Then Scooter see nothing. Scooter do hear something. Scooter hear whooshing sound. Is loud and move away. Sound move higher and farther away. Scooter have good ears. Scooter listen and hear whooshing sound for almost full minute. (Scooter check Scooter watch). Then Scooter not hear anything.
Scooter is sad. Scooter not know what happen. Scooter think Voice leave and will bring back bad people. Scooter have bad plan! Bad Scooter, bad!
Scooter look up in sky where Scooter last hear whoosh sound. Scooter think Scooter see light. Scooter do see light! Light move across sky very fast and then get big and bright! It look like fireworks that scare Scooter! Scooter is afraid of big noise. But big noise does not happen Scooter only hear little pop noise at same time Scooter think Scooter hear Voice.
Voice say “Nooo!” in very excited way. Like Voice is Granny, when Granny see little mouse. Then Voice is gone. Scooter hope Scooter never hear Voice again.
Then Scooter’s tail and nose start to hurt.
Then Scooter think “Scooter did tell Evil Cat to look both ways. Evil Cat not listen”
Car that hit Evil Cat was stop and man get out.
“Damn it! Friggin’ cat just darted out in front of me!”
Other cars are honk at man and drive around him. Man should get out of street before man get hit.
Man must be smarter than Evil Cat. Man take white cloth out of pocket. As man do this coin things also come out and fall on ground. Man move Evil Cat to sidewalk, get back in car and drive away. Scooter remember something else Voice say
“…….No other coin in this area will work…”
Scooter have idea!
Scooter walk over to where man was, and spot coin-thing. Scooter think it same kind coin-thing as coin-thing Scooter swallow. Scooter look both ways because Scooter is smarter than Evil Cat, and quickly lick up other coin-thing. Scooter think this coin thing just taste like dirt. Scooter does not care. Scooter play in dirt all the time!
Scooter look both ways again and quickly cross Bromley Lane and walk towards place where Voice get in Scooter head. Scooter is little afraid. If Scooter plan not work maybe Voice will hurt Scooter. But, Scooter must try. Voice is evil.
When Scooter get close to Voice place, Scooter do ‘Walk Funny’. Scooter keep do “Walk Funny” until Voice is in Scooter head!
‘You have it!” say Voice My sensors register it! Quickly, drop it and back away!”
Scooter let coin thing fall to ground and then Scooter take two steps back.
Scooter is watch coin thing. Coin-thing is there. Coin-thing is not there!
“I must go immediately! My riches await me! Begone you ignorant canine, if you are lucky the miners will kill you first when they arrive to exploit this planet!”
Then Scooter see a flash of light and for very fast second Scooter see a big building thing. Big building thing is jump off the ground. Then Scooter see nothing. Scooter do hear something. Scooter hear whooshing sound. Is loud and move away. Sound move higher and farther away. Scooter have good ears. Scooter listen and hear whooshing sound for almost full minute. (Scooter check Scooter watch). Then Scooter not hear anything.
Scooter is sad. Scooter not know what happen. Scooter think Voice leave and will bring back bad people. Scooter have bad plan! Bad Scooter, bad!
Scooter look up in sky where Scooter last hear whoosh sound. Scooter think Scooter see light. Scooter do see light! Light move across sky very fast and then get big and bright! It look like fireworks that scare Scooter! Scooter is afraid of big noise. But big noise does not happen Scooter only hear little pop noise at same time Scooter think Scooter hear Voice.
Voice say “Nooo!” in very excited way. Like Voice is Granny, when Granny see little mouse. Then Voice is gone. Scooter hope Scooter never hear Voice again.
c
All of sudden Scooter is very tired. Scooter nose hurt! Scooter tail hurt! Scooter backside hurt! Scooter just want to go home.
Scooter think ‘Scooter go home’
Then Scooter is home! Scooter is very surprised. Scooter is in backyard! Scooter feel sick to Scooter tummy! Scooter is get sick! Scooter make mess on grass. Scooter look at mess and see coin-thing.
“Scooter! There you are!” yell Mommy “We thought you got out! We’ve been looking all over for you!”
Then Mommy see Scooter sick-mess.
“Are you OK, boy!’ Mommy say in Mommy worry voice
“Dad! Scooter’s in the backyard!” yell Mommy “and he got sick!’
Granny and Grandpappy are in backyard in quick time. Scooter wag tail and make happy sounds at Mommy.
“Where were you hiding!” say Granny
“Stupid dog” say Grandpappy
Scooter have to remember to poop on Grandpappy patio.
“Ewwwww! What is that?” say Granny looking at Scooter sick-mess
“Looks like he ate a nickel” say Grandpappy “He’s probably allergic. Cheap jewelry has nickel in and that’s why you break out.”
“Then buy me more expensive jewelry” say Granny “And clean this up, so the other dogs don’t get into it.”
Granny and Mommy are be nice to Scooter. They pet Scooter and rub Scooter ears and talk nice to Scooter.
“Oh, my little Cooter.” Say Granny
“Is my little Cootie habba upset tummy?” say Mommy
Scooter is feel fine, but Scooter let Mommy and Granny worry anyway. Maybe Scooter get a hamburger!
“Let’s go inside, Scooter.” say Mommy
Scooter get up and walk to door. Granny, and Grandpappy, and Mommy all follow Scooter. Scooter go inside. Scooter take nice long drink from water bowl.
“Easy, Scooter. You’ll make yourself sick again.” Say Granny
Scooter think ‘Scooter go home’
Then Scooter is home! Scooter is very surprised. Scooter is in backyard! Scooter feel sick to Scooter tummy! Scooter is get sick! Scooter make mess on grass. Scooter look at mess and see coin-thing.
“Scooter! There you are!” yell Mommy “We thought you got out! We’ve been looking all over for you!”
Then Mommy see Scooter sick-mess.
“Are you OK, boy!’ Mommy say in Mommy worry voice
“Dad! Scooter’s in the backyard!” yell Mommy “and he got sick!’
Granny and Grandpappy are in backyard in quick time. Scooter wag tail and make happy sounds at Mommy.
“Where were you hiding!” say Granny
“Stupid dog” say Grandpappy
Scooter have to remember to poop on Grandpappy patio.
“Ewwwww! What is that?” say Granny looking at Scooter sick-mess
“Looks like he ate a nickel” say Grandpappy “He’s probably allergic. Cheap jewelry has nickel in and that’s why you break out.”
“Then buy me more expensive jewelry” say Granny “And clean this up, so the other dogs don’t get into it.”
Granny and Mommy are be nice to Scooter. They pet Scooter and rub Scooter ears and talk nice to Scooter.
“Oh, my little Cooter.” Say Granny
“Is my little Cootie habba upset tummy?” say Mommy
Scooter is feel fine, but Scooter let Mommy and Granny worry anyway. Maybe Scooter get a hamburger!
“Let’s go inside, Scooter.” say Mommy
Scooter get up and walk to door. Granny, and Grandpappy, and Mommy all follow Scooter. Scooter go inside. Scooter take nice long drink from water bowl.
“Easy, Scooter. You’ll make yourself sick again.” Say Granny
c
Scooter is feel fine. But Scooter is tired. Scooter jump up on couch and lay down. Other Good Dogs come run and jump around Scooter. They sniff Scooter and jump and is make Scooter head hurt.
“Where did Scooter go?” say Madie
“Is Scooter find Evil Cat?” say Eve
“Is Scooter see butterfly” say Enzo
“Scooter save the world!” say very proud Scooter as Scooter puff out chest
Good Dogs are look at Scooter funny.
“How Scooter save world?” say Eve like Eve no believe Scooter
“Evil Cat was bring Evil Voice a coin-thing. Coin-thing let Evil Voice go home. Evil Voice bring back many Evil Voices. Evil Voices make Granny and Mommy and Grandpappy go away! Good Dogs, too! Scooter give Evil Voice other coin-thing. Other coin-thing not work! Evil Voice is all gone and Evil Cat get hit by a car!”
Scooter say this in one big fast sentence. Scooter wait for Good Dogs to say something.
“Grandpappy get to stay now?” say Eve
“Mommy get to stay now?” say Madie
“Granny get to stay now?” say Enzo
“Yes!” say Scooter
Good Dogs not say anything. They just look at each other.
“Butterflies get to stay now?” say Enzo
Scooter nod Scooter head
Good Dogs start bark and yell and run around! Good Dogs are very happy!
“Hush Dogs!” say Grandpappy “I’m tring to hear the news!”
Scooter listen
“Repeating this Special Report….NORAD, the North American Areospace Defense Command, has just issued the following report. The red streak visible in the skies over Denver was a large meteor entering the earth’s atmosphere. The red streak and flash was the result of it burning up. NORAD believes that no pieces of it reached the ground. It was not, repeat not, any type of man made craft or government program”
“Did you see the streak they are talking about?” asked Granny
“Nope, my eyes were on the ground looking for that damn dog.” say Grandpappy
Scooter definitely pooping on patio today.
“Did you clean up Scooter’s mess?” say Granny in her mean voice
“Yes, dear. As you know I was put on this earth to be at the beck and call of these dogs. It was the high point of my day.”
Say Grandpappy, but Grandpappy no sound like it was high point
“What did you do with the nickel?” say Granny
“I saved it so you could have it bronzed.” Say Grandpappy. Scooter thinks Grandpappy is fibbing to Granny.
“So you threw it away?” say Granny
“Oh, no, dear. But, I do recommend that you have your bronzing done by Friday” say Grandpappy as Grandpappy walk away.
Granny shake her head.
“He still thinks he’s funny. But, just as long as my little Cooter is OK. Him is the best dog in the world, isn’t him.”
Granny say this while her rub Scooter ears.
Granny is very smart Granny.
“Where did Scooter go?” say Madie
“Is Scooter find Evil Cat?” say Eve
“Is Scooter see butterfly” say Enzo
“Scooter save the world!” say very proud Scooter as Scooter puff out chest
Good Dogs are look at Scooter funny.
“How Scooter save world?” say Eve like Eve no believe Scooter
“Evil Cat was bring Evil Voice a coin-thing. Coin-thing let Evil Voice go home. Evil Voice bring back many Evil Voices. Evil Voices make Granny and Mommy and Grandpappy go away! Good Dogs, too! Scooter give Evil Voice other coin-thing. Other coin-thing not work! Evil Voice is all gone and Evil Cat get hit by a car!”
Scooter say this in one big fast sentence. Scooter wait for Good Dogs to say something.
“Grandpappy get to stay now?” say Eve
“Mommy get to stay now?” say Madie
“Granny get to stay now?” say Enzo
“Yes!” say Scooter
Good Dogs not say anything. They just look at each other.
“Butterflies get to stay now?” say Enzo
Scooter nod Scooter head
Good Dogs start bark and yell and run around! Good Dogs are very happy!
“Hush Dogs!” say Grandpappy “I’m tring to hear the news!”
Scooter listen
“Repeating this Special Report….NORAD, the North American Areospace Defense Command, has just issued the following report. The red streak visible in the skies over Denver was a large meteor entering the earth’s atmosphere. The red streak and flash was the result of it burning up. NORAD believes that no pieces of it reached the ground. It was not, repeat not, any type of man made craft or government program”
“Did you see the streak they are talking about?” asked Granny
“Nope, my eyes were on the ground looking for that damn dog.” say Grandpappy
Scooter definitely pooping on patio today.
“Did you clean up Scooter’s mess?” say Granny in her mean voice
“Yes, dear. As you know I was put on this earth to be at the beck and call of these dogs. It was the high point of my day.”
Say Grandpappy, but Grandpappy no sound like it was high point
“What did you do with the nickel?” say Granny
“I saved it so you could have it bronzed.” Say Grandpappy. Scooter thinks Grandpappy is fibbing to Granny.
“So you threw it away?” say Granny
“Oh, no, dear. But, I do recommend that you have your bronzing done by Friday” say Grandpappy as Grandpappy walk away.
Granny shake her head.
“He still thinks he’s funny. But, just as long as my little Cooter is OK. Him is the best dog in the world, isn’t him.”
Granny say this while her rub Scooter ears.
Granny is very smart Granny.